Apr 30, 2008

Savage observation

After enduring endlessly salacious, quivering coverage from the cable news crowd about the FLDS Jail Bate Fuck Fest in Texas, finally a voice of reason emerges.

As much as I have a problem believing that self-proclaimed-unqualified sexpert, so-gay-I-married-a-dude-in-Canada-and-we-bought-a-baby Dan Savage is, no lie, IN FAVOR of the Iraq War, kudos to him for laying it out thick and hard about those wearers of pastel dresses and elaborate tresses and those who are strangely quiet on their predicament.
When two dudes marry, the marriage-is-between-one-man-and-one-woman brigades crap their collective pants, vomit up ten thousand press releases, and run in circles screaming about all the hurricanes and earthquakes and unattractive haircuts that Our Loving Father™ is gonna rain down on our heads if we don't pry Adam off Steve right fucking now.

Well, the one-man-and-one-woman crowd has been strangely silent about this polygamist sect in Texas that's been all over the news. It appears that the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has been organizing marriages/statutory rapes between one man and dozens or more women and/or girls.

"Where's the outrage?" writes a reader, which prompted me to go looking for some outrage at the website of Concerned Women for America. There are more anti-gay-marriage press releases packed onto CWFA's website than there is fudge packed into all the homos in all the Sodoms in all of North America. But there's not one single word that I could find about these straight men in Texas violating the holy and sacred one-man-and-one-woman rule. What gives?
I'll tell you what gives, Daddy Man. The FLDS scandal doesn't meet the outrage threshold that can only be met if it involves hot homo sex. We can only hope for a NAMBLA chapter within the compound that maybe has not come to light (yet, fingers crossed) and thus for CWFA's rage to be ignited.